Standards: What defines golddigging for men?

email bar


Is wanting a man with something to offer gold digging?

I’d like to believe that you are smart if you go for a man that is accomplished or has something going for himself. There is a difference between wanting something nice, rather than expecting something good with nothing to give in return. I’ll break it down. Women this is inside information and I’m here to educate.

Many men are turned off often times when the first thing women lead with is “What can you do for me?” Even if women don’t say it, if their actions suggest this, men may automatically think that she’s a gold digger. Most men are expecting to come off of something in monetary terms anyway, but he does associate this with something in the future. He is expecting time, affection, and these days maybe more, but not right at first.

We are talking about real men here not boys. We are eventually going to want to have sex with you, but not before we get to know you really well. Because you women think sex is our only aim. Real men are thinking if you would be a good mother, or a hard worker, or a good companion, or can you cook or clean, rather than how fast we can have sex with you. Those things matter to us more than just having sex with you. We want quality women.


In my opinion, if I don’t know you, the first 2 dates I believe that either of the two should pay for themselves, unless the man asked you out to dinner specifically and offered to pay. How many times have guys been at a social place, club, or maybe at a bar, and women are bold about asking them to buy drinks? For me, if I don’t know you, this is a red flag. If I am interested then I’ll probably buy you one simply out of my inclination to be a gentleman. But most women expect this as if its the default thing to do. There are several women who are old fashioned, and think that the man should pay for everything. Well its the 21st century and times have changed. Although I would pay, women shouldn’t expect this right off.

Besides, lots of women place getting what they can get from a man as one of their top priorities, and good men have to be careful that we don’t get taken advantage of.

The difference between gold digging and expecting quality

Some men can’t tell when a woman has standards, and when they’re gold digging so I’ll simplify the process some for you ladies so you know what we’re looking for. In my book “The Truth: Keeping it 100” in Chapter 2 The Prelude, I lay out all the different types of categories that women fall in through a man’s eyes, and I call the gold digger the “wolf disguised as a sheep” because she will do what it takes to get you, but her only aim is to look like a good woman and slowly leach off you. Here’s how we determine whether you fit the description or not. Here is an excerpt from the book.


“The wolf disguised as a sheep generally is a gold-digger. She will do what she can to get you. She will play the role of the good woman, but then she will slowly leach off you. She’s probably looking for a guy who will take care of her. Most of the time these women are direct and pretty, so they feel as if guys owe them”…then I go on to say this and here’s the key…”And there is a difference between a woman who’s confident and wants nice things and earns that treatment, rather than a woman who simply wants that treatment without giving anything in return (gold digger)”Click here to get the book!


If you always have your hand out and are never giving anything, or you’re never asking what you can do for your man or a man who’s trying to court you, you are probably in this category. And from that point on, that guy won’t take you seriously and then will try to figure out what he can get from you whether it is sex, money, or something else. Notice in the quoted statement above, in bold I said earns that treatment. Men have no problem taking care of a woman or spoiling a woman who plays her part and not only receives, but gives as well. It’s okay to want nice things.

What are you all’s thoughts? I would love to hear them. Also let me know how I can provide you with more compelling content. What question about relationships would you like answered? You can send them to my email, or leave a comment below. Thanks for reading!

email bar

If you liked this article, please help someone else by sharing it with all your peeps! Simply click the click to tweet button below! Thank you for sharing!click-to-tweet

Podcast Header! 2017 (1)
Click the picture above to subscribe and to listen to podcast episodes!

One Comment Add yours

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s