In life there will be some things that cause you to experience real fear. I’m not talking about something you have a safety net you can go back to if you fail. I’m talking about when the crap hits the fan and you have to make a decision on where you stand. What am I talking about? It’s easy to support your spouse or significant other in something that’s safe. But the real determining factor of where your true support lies is when you actually have to face fear. That will really make or break you. It will reveal if you really support your partner, or if you just want to support when it’s easy. Real support counts when you’re most afraid.
One of my favorite authors, speakers and radio talk show hosts you’ll hear me talk about often (Dave Ramsey) says that women have a gland that spasms whenever they get worried, or when real fear approaches. Men don’t have that because we are problem solvers. It’s a woman’s natural reaction to have that safety instinct. It’s how she protects her children and the things she loves most.
Recently my wife and I faced such a decision. I’m blessed to currently have a great job that pays well. Even in that situation, we faced real fear. And when I fully quit and pursue speaking and writing full-time, it’s really going to be a cliff of apprehension and anxiety. (For her)
I was and still am trying to get traction for my book and reach more people, and it requires me to have to invest in myself. You’ll hear me say that or preach that on my social media and lots of my motivational posts all the time, but few people can actually put their money where their mouth is. In the literal sense of the phrase: put your money where your mouth is. Talk about practicing what you preach. I was at the point where the rubber meets the road here. I had to make a decision to spend around $1500 per month to hire a marketing company to market and promote my book so I can touch the world (and make some money too). How many of you would be frightened just thinking about it? It scared the heck out of me! And of course it terrified my wife. That gland began to spasm when we went in to talk to my marketing professionals about what we could do and how we could move forward. Spending that much money a month not knowing if you’re going to get a return on investment or if it’s even going to work out, that’s real fear.
We were terrified to make that decision. I actually brought my wife to the marketing meeting even though she didn’t really want to be a part of all that. I value her opinion about such things. She was scared and said, “This is a big step. You must be serious.” I told her I was and I was going to go with whatever we thought was best. She surprised me because I’m always the one saying don’t spend money, we have to save, save, save! Yet here I was asking her to take a journey into the unknown with me, and support me on making a huge decision that would impact a big chunk of our money. We had talked about making a 3-month commitment so that was around $4500. She looked me in the eye, took a deep breath, and said, “Whatever you want to do, I support you.” Do you know how much that can empower a relationship and a marriage when the one you love truly supports you when she’s afraid!? It was an amazing moment. Now, granted we had the money in savings to do it, but any time you spend that much money, I can guarantee you there are some emotions attached to that decision.
You may face something different. Your fear may be something else. But remember real support counts when you’re afraid. Anyone can support you when it’s a safe bet. The true support comes when there are some emotions attached. When you’re staring fear in the face, conquer it with confidence and faith. Be supportive of whatever your mate does (granted it’s within your power or budget to do so). Having someone who supports you tremendously strengthens your relationship, not to mention you don’t take the wind out of their sails. This is how people are empowered, and continue to dream, drive, and pursue their ambitions. If you’re always shooting your mate’s passion or idea down, shame on you. Don’t stifle their passion. When they get to the top, it may not be you on their arm or there beside them. It’s important.
So let’s be supportive, and start seeking the greatness we can achieve in our relationships, and in our life. I hope this has brought someone some value. Thanks for reading!
I wanted to mention that I’ve started a brand new show called the #askmarioshow. You can ask any question you want and I’ll answer it on the show. Check out the first episode below.
I’ve already got over 100 episodes lined up from people just like you that I’m going to answer. Ask your question here. The first 5 episodes are done. You can check out more videos on my brand new revamped video page. View videos here.
These are a few ideas that you can implement right now to start building a healthy relationship, and watch a transformation in your relationships.
The area of relationships is such a major factor in people’s lives that it can affect their standard of living. That’s why I’ve devoted entire chapters to addressing these issues in my book. To get an in -depth guide to navigating relationships, check out my book, The Truth: Keepin’ it 100: The Blueprint to Relationships.
I’m dedicated to helping you build those quality relationships. Its all in the book! And if you want to learn even more tips, tricks and strategies behind the way men think, then you’ve got to listen to this podcast!